she shaved his identity while he slept, cops said skill issue

A man got his beard partially mutilated by a one-night-stand who apparently had the audacity and dexterity to vandalize his face mid-sleep, only to discover law enforcement found the whole situation hilarious rather than criminal. This is the kind of unhinged relationship chaos that makes you realize some people view their temporary bed partners as arts-and-crafts projects. The asymmetrical beard mugshot really sells the desperation of someone whose worst romantic decision came with permanent(ish) consequences.