man discovers girlfriend exists, declares solitude dead and women superior

living with my girlfriend has shown me how much of a donkey i am. shes a beast, probably because she has no hobbies. jokes aside, i truly believe im an organizard and hygienic young man. my space is clean, i clip my nails regularly, and i dont smell like cheese. i really thought i was good at stying on top of my shit, but like usual ive been humbled in dramatic fashion. i am a sea slug in comparison. shes a monster at chores, its incredible. wipes off the counters nightly. no lag on foldng laundry. she gets in there and washes dishes by hand no questions asked. hair is magically always perfect. outfit always on point. bed somehow always made. dust no longer exists. boys, we are outclassed. outgunned and outmanned. getting a girlfriend, a good one, is easily one of the most enjoyable health unlocks in existence. little oxytocin factories. always have a friend to eat dinner with. completely calms the nervous system. initially cuddles are annoying but theyre kinda nice. making plans to do fun things? never have to worry about that anymore. if youre skeptical about living with someone, but you think theyre the right person, dont hesitate for a second. its one of the best things youll ever do. being alone sucks now! if you feel any different i think you gotta find someone else.