Blames modern women on not touching grass in medieval barns
Madelaine Hanson (via @wttp3)โข
TOUCH-GRASS-ENERGYโREMOVE FILTER
Bro discovered a thesaurus and lost his mind in record time
SLOP+ By Nicole Minet (via @wttp3)
So what have we learned about Trump... โ He's a homosexual and heterosexual pedophile. โWhy he says people "die like dogs". โWhat caused his incontinence. โWhy he framed Democrats as newborn baby killers. โAnd that the motherfucker killed at least 3 dogs in different gruesome ways to traumatize...
Man changes email every 15 days, somehow still gets hacked
SLOP+ By Defiant Ghost (via @wttp3)
John McAfee: "If you think you have any privacy whatsoever with an encrypted system, whether it's an email system like ProtonMail or an encrypted messaging system like Signal, you have no privacy." "Your smartphone is the surveillance device preferred by every government on the planet." "Encry...
asking the questions nobody should ever ask, ever
SLOP+ By Oliver (via @wttp3)
"Yeh, yeh, sexualising children is bad, but is it *that* bad?"
free speech means freedom to victimize children, apparently
SLOP+ By Politics For You (via @wttp3)
BREAKING British Far-right activists argue removing their ability to make child porn is stifling their free speech and restricting their freedom.
Reptilian reflexes + martial law fever dream = unhinged masterpiece
SLOP+ By Steve Martin (via @wttp3)
Trump is begging for a war with anyone or everyone. He'll settle for a war with nations or a war against America. At least three reasons: 1. He can declare martial law and suspend habeas corpus. 2.He can suspend the 2026 elections . 3. Epstein files remain hidden. His reptilian reflexes then just h...
Linguistic sleeper agent fakes stroke to flex new language
DoD rebranding to DoW to enable war-based freedom retention
SLOP+ By Suzie rizzio (via @wttp3)
Trump bombed a total of 7 Countries in the 1st year of his 2nd term so far! Apparently this is why they changed the name of the Department of Defense to the Department of War! Trump cares about 3 things right now & thatโs Money,Power & his Freedom & he needs a War to stay free!
Popular Science discovers walking, immediately ruins it
A woman walks past a brick wall with green paint splatter, carrying a mesh bag with groceries. The image is overlaid with text from Popular Science suggesting people should take "fart walks" - an absurdist health trend recommendation that plays on the mundane act of walking with crude humor. Extra...
Nest-based sleeping habits: a valid dealbreaker or peak commitment?
Mom discovers parenting's one weird trick (adoption agencies hate her)
SLOP+ By I Post Forbidden Videos (via @wttp3)
Woman gives up her 7 year old daughter for adoption โThis is one of the best decisions Iโve ever made in my life. Not doing student drop off anymore, not doing homework and not having to do bath routinesโ
Local Karen becomes unlikely drug dealer via Facebook PSA
A Facebook post by Debbie Newson showing a hand holding a small clear container filled with what appears to be cannabis buds on a muddy path outdoors. A white dog can be seen in the background on the grassy common. The post is framed as a humorous lost-and-found notice. Extracted text: Pot of cann...
Remember when entertainment was just objectification? Pepperidge Farm remembers.
bro really said 'I hate you' 47 times and called it poetry
SLOP+ By ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ช๐ถ๐ด (via @wttp3)
. @elonmusk I fucking hate you. Thereโs no amount of hate that can surpass the hate that I have for you. You are a scumbag of a human. A traitor to humanity and a criminal hellbent on ruining America. You will rue the day when everyone will know how sick and incomprehensibly evil you truly are. I h...
London is literally Fallout 4 apparently
SLOP+ By Parody Nigel Farage (via @wttp3)
London is a war zone - take care out there.
touching grass would help this guy more than dating advice
dave lawrence (via @wttp3)โข
raw egg nationalist discovers reproductive biology, loses mind
SLOP+ By Jack Posobiec (via @wttp3)
BREAKING: THE TRANSGENDER MOVEMENT IS BECOMING LETHAL AS TRUMP IS TAKING AWAY THEIR MEANS OF REPRODUCTION RAW EGG NATIONALIST EXPLAINS
homophobic logic pretzelcareer conspiracy arcunhinged psychoanalysis
bro really said sexuality is a career hack, unhinged conspiracy energy
Collin Rugg (via @wttp3)โข
man discovers legs, immediately abandons all responsibility
SLOP+ By Particular_Reserve37
I would run like the wind. Why stay?
guy discovers shame exists, wonders why it's not working
SLOP+ By henrickaye
You haven't given any examples of a space that isn't designed for that, so what do you mean by that exactly? And I don't think I am misunderstanding ...
Breaking: Local reports existence of reptiles in outdoor environment
SLOP+ By @gradientLX701
I've seen lizards when I go outside
Most people do nothing except the ones who do things, apparently
SLOP+ By @andreimaxwell4455
Just look around, vast amount of people do nothing all day, just eat and sleep and follow social norms, only people doing a bit more are the ones livi...
Boomer discovers AI chatbots, decides humanity is doomed
SLOP+ By James Melville (via @wttp3)
This is so weird. Why on earth would anyone find companionship with an AI โcompanionโ? None of this is remotely healthy or real. Itโs actually seriously fucked up.
speedrunning a life change announcement with zero follow-through guarantee
BBC, defend your artist or face the loneliness epidemic wrath
Really love it if BBC Hereford & Worcester would address the disgusting misogyny in this comment thread. If you're showcasing this artist, put some effort in to defending her. Men. This is why there is a loneliness epidemic. So many of you are so unlikeable.
Facebook boomer discovers minding own business, acts like they invented it
Not gonna happen..normalize minding your own business
Forgetting breakfast = laziness, not systemic issues (take powered by pure vibes)
Basil the Great (via @wttp3)โข
speedrunning existential dread with one sentence
How does one opt out of this species?
Naked productivity advice from someone very confused about current events
SLOP+ By Repair The Breach (via @wttp3)
What invasion? What are you blathering on about? Put some clothes on and do something useful.
nothing here is funny hรด: the manifesto nobody asked for
SLOP+ By @RockCreeksideIii
โ@melyssaExplainsItAllnothing here is funny hรด
peak creative writing: three words, zero originality, maximum cope
Stfu societal slug